Too Much Info (TMI)

By | February 6, 2018

Good friend Ricky unilaterally declared the advent of Autumn, as soon as Labour Day (September 4) passed. I unilaterally approved his declaration.

       Early September, I have begun to feel lower joint pains when the mercury fell below seasonal. With several more days before summer officially ends (September 21) and before my wife even thinks of imposing marital law with a ka-na-diyan twist (come on, you’ve heard the old joke), the tungkod (cane), the saklay (crutches), and the still invisible walker were made readily available – in case.

       Let’s stop here. A wheelchair is unimaginable, yet.

*****

       A dog is man’s best friend, so it is said. I wish I had one, so my friend could take me for a regular walk.

       Promise, I would never lift a leg. Also, my friend does not have to bring a plastic bag.

*****

       When an outdoor trip is ideal and I desire to tag along but my knees are wobbling, I create frenzy by shouting: “Hurry, cane!”

*****

       One time, I did such and my granddaughter asked: “Lolo, where did you put your cane?”

       My reply: “Ask the last person who used it. If he forgot, hand me over the umbrella.”

       That was how I ended up modeling a long black umbrella on a beautiful day at the Ex.

*****

       Another time I did such, my grandson gave me the glance of Disciple Thomas and dismissed me with the comment: “Yummy, but it’s not Christmas yet, Lolo.”

      That was how he weakened the “Hurry, cane!” episodes, and built up my resolve to avoid a landfall.

*****

       At the regular Saturday get-together and roundtable (a misnomer, as we occupy either square or rectangular tables) meeting of goldies at a local mall’s fast food section, the discussions focused on storms and hurricanes, earthquakes, surges and floods, wildfires, and etc. Kuya Andres said these life-threatening events are to be taken seriously, and early safety warnings should be heeded.

       Then the oral exchange turned spirited but civil as it centered on man-made disasters like ethnic cleansing, wars (and impending threats of a nuclear holocaust), the rampant exploitation and destruction of natural resources, murderous rampages executed with impunity, cultural genocide etal. Tito Danny said these should be stopped.

       “What now?” Pete asked.

       Mang Temyong stood up and gently said: “Mauna na ako sa inyo. Manonood na lang ako ng replay ng America’s Got Talent’.”

       Kaka Ponso yawned and followed: “Ako rin. Ubos na ang laway ko, wala man lang nagpakape.”

       Amused, I found the spark to write a treatise on ‘TMI: Effective Senior Repellant’.       

*****

       On the next Saturday, we all seem to have forgotten what we talked about the past Saturday.

       Discussions will again revolve around our great lives as fit seniors and doting grandfathers.

       The joy and the laughter fill the table once more, kahit walang magpakape.

*****

       Going back: Midway through discussions on Hurricanes Harvey, Irma and Jose that devastated several Caribbean nations and the south of the U.S. of A. and the Magnitude 8.1 temblor that shook Mexico, a question was raised: How can we help to ease the dire condition of our affected southern neighbors and the other victims?

       The only sane answer: If you do not have the brawn and skill to physically lend a hand – evacuation, rescue, cleanup, power restoration and rebuilding, the only brainy thing to do is to donate cash that could be properly spent to buy the immediate basic needs – food, water, shelter, etc. — of the victims. Emoting is of no use; and don’t even try to check the missing hole in your pocket. Immediacy of generosity is the catchphrase after any tragedy.

       However, donating money comes with an advice: Be wary of the agency, charity and people who seek for donations. Better yet, give to the agency, charity or people you trust, those who have the track record of delivering the goods for the intended.        

*****

       It was not the first time I’ve seen and heard – on live TV — a broadcaster say: This tragedy has brought out the best in man; but it also unleashed the worst in some.

       The boob tube person was referring to the rash of looting that followed the evacuation of people from hurricane-prone areas moments before Irma came to kiss a part of Florida goodbye.

       A friend said that man’s innate urge to either survive in trying times or do away with unpleasant situations elicits the most irrational behavior and conduct in him; thus, his worse self easily becomes visible to others.

       Sigh! I am reminded of Alberto S. Florentino’s short story The World Is An Apple.

       Whatever, I still believe that all bad things do happen for a reason, but shall come to pass. However, I am still beholden to the Ten Commandments.

       P.S.: I still wish to see and hear about the best of men before, during and after any calamity, catastrophe, disaster and tragedy, whoever and wherever they are.

*****

       When the kids congregate, they talk about stuff that makes things easier to do or work on for them.

       Young adults? They talk about work, earning more, enjoying life and preparing for a bright and stable future.

       Older adults? When they meet, some talk, some whisper, some stay mum. This reminds me of a very organized couple. When the wife talks about her tiring day doing the household chores and raising up the kids, the husband has to listen with intent. When the husband talks about what happened on September 11 years past, the unsavory verbal barbs that may ignite a world nuclear war, the plight of refugees, and other nasty ways of the world, the wife returns to her chores and the kids.

       Seniors and retirees? That treatise TMI: Effective Senior Repellant needs to be in paper the soonest.

       Never worry. It would be followed with an essay on Why Wise Old Men Like To Be Like Kids. #####