Christmas requires a certain stillness to perceive its meaning. If we isolate ourselves from the fanfare for a few moments, Christmas begins to give up its mysteries…the hidden presents! There have been good days, bad days, so-so days. But hey, we need to be thankful. We have the gift of life. What a beautiful present.
I remember a rare Christmas song that seems to give us the perfect definition of Christmas – The Secret of Christmas by Bing Crosby: It’s not the glow you feel, when snow appears, It’s not the Christmas card, you’ve sent for years, not the joyful sound when sleigh bells ring, or the merry songs children sing, the little gift you send on Christmas day will not bring back the friend you’ve turned away, so may I suggest, the secret of Christmas, It’s not the things you do at Christmas time but the Christmas things you do, all year through.
Actually this is the favorite of two special people in my life, FPJ and SUSAN R now on their 54th wedding anniversary (they got married on Christmas Day, 1968).
Flashback: I remember It was on Dec 8, 1968 when I was with Ate Sue at a holiday party. The wildest rumor: she and FPJ had broken up for good. After dinner we were seated together and a Johnny Mathis song filled the air, “Who can I turn to, When nobody needs me, My heart wants to know, And so I must go, Where destiny leads me…”
“You hear the song?” she whispered. “It’s going to be a sad Christmas…” she added. Without me asking her so many questions, I knew it’s true. Split na sila!
Who would guess that 8 days later, Dec 16th, Unang Simbang Gabi, she and FPJ would reconcile, elope and get married in civil rites first, and then a grand wedding on Christmas Day? Dearest Ate Sue, it’s your first Christmas in Heaven with Kuya FPJ. I still miss you though…very much.
Q and A with Stars (ALI SOTTO, JANICE DE BELEN, MARICEL SORIANO, GINA ALAJAR, RICKY DAVAO, ROGER/CHER CALVIN)
These questions help reflect on the year that’s been, also in keeping with the true holiday spirit. I’d say it’s celebrating HIS birth and these celebs have the same priority – being grateful to HIM. Praise our Lord.
- What strengths/weaknesses have you discovered about yourself this year?
ALI: Every weekday after our morning program, I would ask my co-anchor Pat-P Daza where she is off to and I would marvel at how full her day is with lunches and dinners and meetings and parties. And then recently at a lunch get-together with INA (Inang Naulila ng Anak, a support group of mothers who have lost a child) Atty Lorna Kapunan said we now must take advantage of every opportunity to be with friends and loved ones. Maybe because we all have lost someone recently, we have realized how tenuous life is and how we must live each day as if it were our last. Cliches are cliches because they are true
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JANICE: My realizations of a lot of things happened during the onslaught of the pandemic. Strength is my ability to adapt because I was in between jobs and was worried about my finances so I started selling sa neighborhood food groups naman. Weakness is kids and grandkids… sometimes I forget my children are adults and should start doing things for themselves…
MARICEL: Because of the pandemic many strengths came out like Friendships strengthened because even when you don’t see each other you know they are still there for you . Mahalaga ang mga kaibigan.
GINA: I am a negative thinker. I do have some moments of depressimn but my strength comes from God alone.
RICKY: There was one deep self-discovery (strength) I had during the peak of pandemic-and it was about being frightened – that I could really be scared of death. Never in my dreams did I imagine that I will be experiencing a war without seeing the enemy. One incident happened where everybody in the family had to isolate because it was really strict. My granddaughter was positive with covid and was confined in the hospital. I was having a videocall with her when something happened and I couldn’t do anything. It was painful watching your granddaughter where I almost thought she’d be gone. I was so helpless.
I came to a realization that I still have this “soft spot” in me especially if it’s about my family and real friends getting sick. I became more prayerful and that in times of trouble, I can still remain calm and focus in fixing, dealing with things and making major decisions in life.
CHER: I have discovered a lot about owning my womanhood, fighting and advocating for women’s rights and forging forward to close the gap in gender pay equality. This has also been my weakness. Sometimes realizing your weaknesses is in turn your strength.
ROGER: By nature I am too generous and I’ve been called so unreasonably generous, beyond my control at times.
2. What is something you have read this year that made you think more deeply? Was there a quote or saying that resonated throughout the year? A phrase that kept you going through the tough times that you lived or led by?
ALi: Years ago, I saw an Anderson Cooper interview of Stephen Colbert on grief, and recently I heard snippets of it again on his podcast. Stephen, who at the age of 10 lost his father and two brothers in a plane crash said:
“What punishments of God are not gifts? If you are grateful for your life then you have to be grateful for ALL of it, including the things you wish have not happened.”
I suffer (I hope the use of the present tense is not lost on you) the death of a beloved child. I have learned to accept it as part of who I am, and in many ways, it defines me. I am grateful that this pain has made me more empathetic with other people’s loss and has gifted me with a deeper appreciation of the finite number of days we have together.
JANICE: I have a “go to” book when I’m down or anxious. it’s been with me for years BEING HAPPY BY ANDREW MATTHEWS. It keeps me sane when things start getting crazy.
MARICEL: Actually it’s what I experienced this year when I lost Tito James COOPER that it made me think deeply how precious time is. I realized that we must spend as much time as we can with our loved ones. Time is GOLD so do not waste it. Always put GOD first in everything you do.
GINA: Joshua 1:9. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go, We live in a very scary world.
RICKY: I have read so many articles about Covid-19 in social media where people were dying, young and old were gone too soon. I got moved and realized the importance of life – that it is indeed too short. We must enjoy life to the fullest as we only live once. Spend more time with your family and friends. Show them you care and that they are important. A simple phrase that plays a huge impact in my life – that death is just around the corner (i hope not, but it lurks there) hence, let’s not limit ourselves to just one thing, instead, we must enjoy life, do things that scares us the most, give more quality time with the family, loved ones and friends.
CHER: Re-read Sheryl Sandbergs’s Lean In this past month. It’s a must read for every woman in the workforce. In my opinion, it’s not a memoir, it’s a textbook. Take notes. It is probably the most important book you can read as a career woman… “progress, not perfection” Thy WIll Be Done. It’s all in God’s plan. God please come in…. be with us.
ROGER: Actually because of the war between Ukraine and Russia, I’ve been bothered by the negativity of Putin. I am in awe of Ukrainians’ values – education, professionalism, they are extremely generous and hospitable, I have started reading up on their culture too.
3. What or who are you grateful for, right now, in this moment?
ALI: On Audible, I am listening to my fave actress Viola Davis’ powerful and beautifully nuanced narration of her autobiography “Finding Me.” She now has her Tonys, Oscars and Emmys but she was born black, poor and ugly. What her therapist said years later about how, instead of trying to heal her 8-year old self she should be proud of her because she survived. It makes us think about our past broken selves, the pain and heartbreak we have overcome. And yes! We are all survivors! I am highly favored and extremely blessed, and I am grateful. Thankful for the privilege of being a voice people listen to. To have this platform to educate and inform, to entertain and to uplift lives. I especially appreciate messages from young girls who have been moved and inspired by our “love yourself you are enough” mantra.
JANICE: I am grateful for GOD’s Love and mercy. I am grateful for every breath I take…for each day I’m still here. Grateful for my children even though we disagree at times. Thankful to: My grandchildren for the joy they give me; My dogs for their unconditional love; My friends for all the moral and emotional support; Grateful to be able to work and i’m grateful my dad is well and strong.
MARICEL: I am always and truly grateful to GOD who always makes me feel that He is with me all the time.
GINA: I am grateful to God for my famiy, my life, my future.
RICKY: I am still blessed and I thank God because I still had work during those times when the world was in lockdown. I am very grateful to my producers for their trust, same with my collegues, family, relatives and friends for their continued support.
CHER: Grateful for right now at this moment. God, for always giving me hope, all that I need… and a loving family that has grown exponentially since I got married last August ’21
ROGER: First I’m grateful to God for who I have become. At my current age I have never stopped to educate myself and learned a lot through Google.
4. If there was some habit or tendency you’d like to leave behind in 2022, what would it be?
JANICE: Being too emotional when it’s about my kids
MARICEL: My being anti social
GINA: Putting everything on hold, then doing it at the last minute, – guilty of procrastination.
RICKY: You know, there’s a lot to mention about. But I’d like to just focus on these things: procrastination, having negative thoughts, involving too much drama in life and (sometimes) being impatient.
CHER: Bringing my cell phone to bed and scrolling before I sleep!! I want to practice mindfulness, not mindlessness before sleep now! Prayer and meditation is a better way to end the day. Full of gratitude.
ROGER: I worry about petty stuff, I am trying hard to let go of this habit.
5. If you had to choose a theme song which lifts you up or has merely kept you sane in 2022, what would it be?
ALI: I danced and sang to Lizzo’s “About Damn Time.” It’s definitely my 2022 anthem. “Oh, I’ve been so down and under pressure, I’m way too fine to be this stressed, yeah, Oh, I’m not the girl I was or used to be, Uh, bitch, I might be better, Turn up the music, turn down the lights, I got a feelin’ I’m gon’ be alright…
”
JANICE: I love the song RAINBOW (south border). I always think that it’s a song made for me (it’s not though that’s what makes it relatable). The song brings a lot of comfort. And I love rainbows and colors.
MARICEL: The song with the lines …GOD Will make a way when there seems to be no way
GINA: Goodness of God
RICKY: When I was isolating myself during the peak of pandemic, I was just listening to some old songs in my room then I came across these songs and realized that we all should still remain positive, inspite of the situation. I am pertaining to the songs “Heal the World” by Michael Jackson and “What a Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong.
CHER: Cold Heart Dua Lipa/Elton John
ROGER: There’s one song that keeps playing in my head n that’s “ it’s now or never “ by Elvis Presley n Cris Isaak version.
6. What is something about yourself that you are finally willing to accept and embrace?
ALI: My son recently told me: “Ma, ang tingin ng mga apo mo sa iyo kalaro, hindi lola.” Ahahaha! I am more than thankful for this! My first year high school class adviser Miss Luna wrote on my report card: “She is brutally frank to the point of being apathetic.” Hinanap ko pa noon sa Webster’s ang meaning ng “apathetic.” I was 12 years old! I have learned to embrace that part of me. I say it as it is. But now that I am much older and a wiser, I have learned to temper my words. ‘Ika nga ni Winston Churchill: Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
JANICE: I have “love yourself” tattooed in my right arm to remind me.
MARICEL: I have learned to accept that it’s better to think before you talk ! Hahahahaha!
GINA: Getting old.
RICKY: Its as simple as letting go of the things you cant change and stop worrying about things you can’t control. We have limitations in life. Make do with what we have, deal with it, accept things in a positive way and be thankful we are still alive. Of course, it is easier said than done but we have to start somewhere – NOW!
CHER: Finally willing to accept… and embrace: aging… as gracefully as I can.
ROGER: I had always wanted to have a son for years – did not happen. But it’s okay. Cher got married and thank GOD her hubby, AKI, is heaven-sent. He’s so ideal and loving.
MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone! Here’s to a happier 2023 – always be grateful.