Beyond the backdrop of trees and flowering plants lining the path towards our house, I often times heard from old folks as they sipped their freshly brewed Batangas coffee in a morning tete-a-tete the often repeated and often uttered philosophical view that marriage is a sacred institution that no one put asunder.
To those old folks, marriage is not something that must be taken lightly like a bicycle ride in a park. It is something that binds husband and wife for the rest of their lives till death do they part regardless of the circumstances that bound them in holy matrimony. It is the institution not the parties that matters. If you must growl, then damn to your heart’s content. There is no way you can get out of marriage except by annulment which is very expensive. Only the politicians, who are Roman Catholics by religion but atheists in practice, and the filthy rich and smugglers could afford a costly annulment proceeding. The asking price by lawyers for simple annulment case is P150, 000. A PAO (public attorney’s office) lawyer could charge a little less for P50, 000 but you may not be sure if you get a favourable judgment. PAO lawyers are free but they charge you under the table. Where would a farmer or a fisherman get that money if his wife runs away with another man? Or where would an ordinary wife beg for this huge sum of money if her man wants it quits? Getting an annulment is easy if you are Chiz Escudero or Koko Pimentel. Better yet, go to law school and become a lawyer.
Husbands and wives live in bondage when love is genuine no more, when pain continues to rip the heart, when mutual respect is present no more, and when violence dominates and when harmony and oneness exist no more.
It is good to think that you sleep with your partner one day and wake up together the next day without fear of the outside of the world because you feel secured.
Marriage is good if love can still witness the breaking of dawn or the setting down of the sun.
There is no point of preserving the marriage if the recipe for a good relationship vanishes like a whiff of fresh air in a sun-soaked Toronto.
That’s why in North America, Filipinos take advantage of the divorce law when their relationships with their spouses go sour. For $1000 or less, divorce could be obtained if the other spouse does not contest the application. Grounds for divorce are straightforward. In Ontario, the ground for divorce is marriage breakdown which may either be due to cruelty, adultery or one-year separation. For cruelty and adultery, evidence is required to prove it because of its very nature. The one-year separation is the easiest and there is no need to prove it. The only problem in divorce proceedings is the difficulty of serving the other spouse with divorce application especially if he or she is outside Canada. But a motion may be filed to dispense the need for service.
In the Philippines, a bill allowing Filipinos to obtain divorce is being considered in congress. For sure, it will have rough sailing as the Catholic Church will be on guard to block any attempt. Filipino politicians fear the Catholic Church as it could make or unmake a president.
But it is high time that the Philippine government should take a second look at it. Divorce should be accessible to anybody regardless of status and it should not be denied when marriage has no hope of saving like a ship that is about to sink into the bottom of the ocean.
I could not imagine myself sipping a freshly brewed Batangas coffee and still view marriage in a traditional way when doing so will only wreak havoc on my being. But I love the old folks when they started walking at the narrow path of our house while whistling and gamely said, “(L)ife is short. Enjoy while it lasts.”
(The writer is a member of the Law Society of Upper Canada and Integrated Bar of the Philippines. He formerly contributed articles for the Peoples’ Journal and its broadsheet, The Courier. The article is a general opinion only and should not be treated as an independent legal advice. Please direct comments to rignaciolaw@gmail.com or contact (905) 597-0963.)